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Apologizing to my Love

by JB
(North Wales, U.K)

I upset my boyfriend a few weeks ago by getting very very drunk and not acting like myself. I said some nasty things and completely embarrassed myself and him in front of the people we were out with.

Understandably, in the morning he broke up with me and ordered me to get my things out of the house by the end of the week.

I am completely and utterly heartbroken and disgusted with myself. He is a truly amazing man. It was so out of character of me to act this way.

I do not blame the alcohol or any other reason or factor: this is all my fault and I take complete responsibility.

In order to apologize I promised him all the usual fare of "I won't drink again" but this sentence is so cliched it lacks any real meaning behind it (even though I do obviously mean it! I don't want to be that person again!) So, I bought him flowers, a PS3 game he wanted and wrote him a song. This didn't work and so for the next week or so I continued to feel depressed and upset with myself.

For Christmas, I intend to give it another go. I have decided to truly put my heart on the line and really go for it in order to show him how much I regret what's happened.

I wrote a love note before we broke up which I still intend on giving him (in order to show him how much I loved, and love, him)and another note explaining how sorry I am, I made a photo booklet of some of our photos together from during our relationship and I made him some cupcakes and cookies.

Last year I returned from living in Spain for the year. During my time there, I wrote a diary. In it I wrote of how much I missed him and every day I make reference to him. Therefore, I am also going to give him these diaries to read in order to see how much he's in my thoughts.

I really hope it works...I miss him so much.



From The Perfect Apology Team:
JB... We wish you all the best and hope things work out for you.

You mentioned you take full responsibility for your actions (a key ingredient when apologizing) but did you relay that information along with a heartfelt apology to your boyfriend?

The gifts, your diary, a memory book... are all great ideas but make sure that they are not replacing your sincere apology or being perceived as the apology.

Make sure you follow the ingredients for a perfect apology that we mention here on the site and deliver it to him face to face along with all the wonderful things you intend to give him.

At that point, you will have done all you can do. The rest will be up to him. We wish you the best and good luck!

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Sad
by: Sophie

I'm in the same situation right now. I miss him so much! And hes my 1st love. I've made a lot of mistakes in the past that I never got to explain to him because I was scared that I couldn't find the words and was scared of what his reaction would be. So I've decided to write it all down like you did. And just basically tell him how much he means to me.

When I've had a drink I don't act myself either. I get to the point where I'm legless and can't see what I'm doing or who I'm with. My body cant handle it 1 bit.

Since the split I've not turned to the drink like I would of done a long time ago because I've suffered with depression for a long period. And also if you've heard of it I suffer with Cystic Fibrosis so you can understand why I chose to drink cos I couldn't be bothered looking after myself and I didn't want to live anymore.I still have that problem now.

I'm 20 now and through the years Ive been bullied cos of it. But my ex isn't like that. And that's a reason why I'm in love with him cos he's the only guy that's had respect 4 me :(. And never treated me like I was an outsider which is what I feel like anyway. I'm trying so hard to get him back and I really hope he will forgive me for the bad things I did.

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