Cheated on Him While Pregnant


(San Diego)

I cheated on him by flirting with another man. He caught me because that guy was one of his friends and he let him borrow his phone to use and he was logged in to Facebook and saw the messages I sent him.


He hit me twice before he stopped, he started yelling at me. I was scared, and I didn't know whether to tell him the truth or deny it.. but I thought how can I deny something when he had all the evidence in his hands...

I told him the truth and he broke up with me. I couldn't cry I felt so guilty. But I wasn't hurting at that time until the next day when he decided to get all his clothes out and leave us... Well just me, and then he told his kids that he was going to come get them on the weekend...

I realized that I had lost the most important person in my life... He was the only one who was there with me through thick and thin... He was there when my parents resented me for being pregnant at a young age... and he was there every time something bad happened in my family and I was never there for him when his uncles died...I just didn't know what to say to him... I didn't even tell him that everything was okay... I never told him anything that comforted him.

I cheated on him while I was pregnant and he just doesn't want to rub my belly or talk to our son because he thinks someone else is the father but I know he is the one.

I told him if he wanted to make sure he could take a DNA test... and he said he was going to test all of our kids because he doesn't trust me. He says that what if these kids are not his and he's been doing someone elses job? That really hurt me so bad.

I thought of aborting this baby but I just couldn't because it isn't his fault. It was all my fault... he doesn't deserve this but I ruined our family and now I am paying for it.

Every time I see him, I feel like crying. Every time he goes to work or I don't know were he is, I feel like he's going to cheat on me and get me back for what I did to him. I feel so angry at myself and I don't know how to fix it.

He forgave me, we're together but I can't be happy knowing I hurt him badly... Every time we watch Jerry Springer or cheating shows and DNA test shows, I walk away and start crying because I feel like he just wants me to hurt because of what I've done to him... how can I fix it???

I've been praying but it hurts so bad....and he already told all our friends that I cheated on him and its sad because now I feel embarrassed and disappointed because I never thought it was going to get this far.

Dear Victor,

I am sorry I cheated on you. I know that you never expected this from me but I did it because everything in our relationship was going bad. You didn't have a job, you weren't helping me with our kids, and you couldn't even keep me happy.

All I felt was stress when I was around you and I just wanted to feel loved and I was pregnant, but we didn't even know after the incident that you caught me.

All I can say is I am sorry, and even though you did forgive me I am the one who still feels upset because you can't even touch my belly or talk to our new baby like you did with our other kids.

I am the one who is afraid that you might cheat on me to get me back, our relationship will never be the same...we have trust issues and it hurts me so bad because I was the one who ruined our happy family even though I wasn't happy.

Comments for Cheated on Him While Pregnant

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Who are you to judge?
by: Anonymous

Who are you hypocrites to judge like you have never done anything in your life to hurt someone. Perhaps not in the same way but only God can judge. Complete and utter disgrace from reading the comments like you are all on some high horse and perfect. Take a look at your own lives before you take time out of your lives to criticize another's.

Forgiveness
by: Anonymous

I'm in the same boat. I've been with my boyfriend for a year and I got pregnant. After I was pregnant I thought my life was going to be perfect because I have the man I love, but I caught him talking to another girl who is prettier than me. So I did the same but this time I actually slept with another man. My boyfriend didn't sleep with anyone else. And since the day I got caught cheating, every day he reminds me about it. I feel like such a bad mother and a lover. Of course he told his family, but he forgave me.

Some bones cannot be mended like our relationship. Everyday I felt so guilty with him, so I had to leave him. I didn't want to be blamed everyday and be accused of cheating again.

I did what I had to do in order to be happy again. My now ex still visits our daughter and loves her truly but he can't stand to see me, so I'm avoided as much as possible.

I wish I didn't cheat and maybe things would have turned out better but you shouldn't feel ashamed for the rest of your life. You need to ask yourself "does he still make me happy?... Will things still be the same?"

Just know that everyone gets over things, it takes time but you will move on eventually. This whole experience has made me a different person and I now learned from my mistakes. You need to forgive yourself. You're not a bad person, you're an amazing woman and a mother.

blame your self
by: Anonymous

When he was not employed all you thought was about yourself not being loved whilst he was stressed thinking of were he was going to get money to take care of you. You were never there when your hubby needed you the most.

apology
by: Anonymous

I hope you feel some guilt for the rest of your life. You don't feel sorry and ashamed. You're just sorry and ashamed you got caught.

Agree with first commenter.
by: Anonymous

Your apology is less of an apology when you try to justify the fact that you cheated, especially by blaming him!

He wasn't there for you, he didn't have a job.. etc. Well, it still doesn't give you permission to cheat does it? You should've talked it out with him.

Not his fault.
by: Anonymous

You are blaming him in your apology, try explaining how you feel i.e. I felt unloved, not "you didn't love me" make it less finger pointy.

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