You were there for me when no one else was. You were my soul mate when we were growing up. You were my everything.
I used to look forward to seeing your face. I love you so very much, I always have, I really cannot help it. Sure I have never been very good at showing it, I even wrecked everything with you and I am so very sorry.
Losing you was the worst mistake of my entire life. When we fell out years ago all I could think about for years was you, that is why I started to drink to try to escape from all the pain I have caused you and everyone else. And, to try and escape from all the pain I have caused myself. But the truth is I have never been able to forgive myself for everything I have done and for everything I have done to you.
I miss you so so much, you're my world Danielle.
I don't know what to do without you. You always made me laugh, you knew when to listen or give advice. You were never scared to tell me when I was wrong plus I always listened to you. I listened to every single word you said.
You are such a truly amazing person and touch the heart of everyone you meet, or at least you touched my heart. I need you, you're like the sister I never had and I really do miss you so very much. I really want to be a part of your life and I really want you to be a part of my life.
I know I have made mistakes. I know I have upset people and although it's no excuse I was not well for years and the only person that could see it was you, because you were the only person that truly knew me. But, at that time you were to young to do anything about it.
I only have myself to blame for losing you and I am trying so very hard to make it right. Please try to see that I am desperately trying. I need you in my life, at least online. I will work at it. I will do absolutely anything, even if that means giving you years of space. I will do it, if you would just give me the chance to prove it.
Although I can not make you like me or even want to talk to me ever again I really do hope that you do. I have never stopped loving you and I never will.
I miss you. I am truly sorry for everything, including all the emails I sent. I was getting obsessed but I just really miss you and need you to know how truly sorry I am. x