To Salena—the most precious and amazing girl in the world... I want to say sorry for everything. I've been a horrible friend and an even worse boyfriend.
I want you to know it was never my intention to break your heart. I messed up and said sorry so many times but actions speak louder than words and I have never shown it. We constantly had a lack of miscommunication and I'll admit that was because of me.
I always had a problem telling people how I felt, I still do, and I was afraid that you would find me annoying or be a burden on you and it ended up making it worse.
I had a lot going on with my family and I never let you in my house because my family argued a lot and it was embarrassing. Remember when we were at the sophomore hop and the whole drive there they just argued the whole time and I did not want a repeat of that.
I also would not talk to you for long periods of time. It was never because I was upset with you, I never was. But I was in a (mood) and did not want to take it out on you. I should have let you know that.
Also I should have been more aware of what I said. I offended you a lot and I thought it was a joke but I should have known better.
I loved you and your family. They always treated me with love and respect and that meant a lot.
I realized how bad of a boyfriend I was when you left during the summer. Everything was grey and you were color. You were the only thing I looked forward to during the school day.
I'm sorry. I know you told me when you were coming back and I didn't meet you but I want you to know that I asked someone to buy me movie tickets so we can watch a movie together but we didn't have a chance.
We broke up and got back together so many times and you'd change and you tried. I didn't.
I love you and I always will.
I understand you moved on and found someone new. I hope he's better than me. That he responds to you, that he shows you that he cares and that he treats you with respect, because you deserve the everything you want.
Please say hi when we see each other. I know we cant be friends but please don't walk by and act like I don't exist that really hurt.